i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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