We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
