you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
