Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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