bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Randomize
