I'm sorry my penis didn't work
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize
