and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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