But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
