M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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