i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
