She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
And then he peed in my hair
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