I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I would ride that face into the sunset
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
