Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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