4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
