Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize