bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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