Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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