i would punch a child for taco bell
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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