You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
