That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
