"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
