After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
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