Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
