There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm getting married
To pizza
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
