Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
