I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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