my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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