peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
she told me i tasted like america
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
