this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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