So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
