This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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