Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
