Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
These tits shall not be calmed
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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