Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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