check it out our google latitudes are spooning
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Welp...herpes.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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