I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
