yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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