she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
