North Korea, Best Korea!
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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