i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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