Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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