is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Randomize
