You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
