so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
