it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
