what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
