I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
