yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
