we made out on top of his cat.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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