Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
