i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
